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/???" f B ???\V \?\???? ? /? 7?? ?F??E?T ?- ?RFD?? \?-????.???? ? ? W!.? ? ?? "'? wedding day joy is crowned by the thought that her Ring is the ). ? ? ? ? Srar ? ???71r ? ?"? perfect that money can buy. H. Samuel's "Lucky" Wedding Rmssare "LHMV" \\? perfect-periect in beauty, perfect in their golden purity, peffect for a lifetime's uW,EEDnnD!XMXQ ?R!MUMCS \TK!v)F!? t'? f f'F ??' With ??? '? Samuel presents a special handsome ￼ G*QFT FREE ￼ fashionable .tyIes ??????'.?'1? ? ?S? WiTM?? S-F?T-M? .W /!&, u u r r 11; Solid Gold. Sold by .ight. ??'? ?.???? ??'- ￼ ?. 21/- WEDDING PRESENTS 'yedding Riilg & .? with ? ?? x?\j? ??;?ESr\? :???? J?. T of iifelong value, ?at money-saving ? ???? some Wedding Gift ?? 1 N,?,eper 10 6 f'p¡, next to Factory Prices. the tv? 106 Come H S ￼ EL 7 S T ￼ ￼ -5,, ￼ I ￼ ￼ :01 HE WAnd,-Lt 6. Oaeer-, Street. you, And t 6. Queen Streat. TO-DA Y I Watchmaker to the Admiralty. ?_ L 3
HUMOUR OF THE WEEKI
HUMOUR OF THE WEEK. I ) RETRIBUTION. I An attack of German measles prevented a. conscientious objector appearing before the London appeal tribunal. t I r I SECCOTINE FOR COWS. I In the King's Bench Divisional Court a farmer appealed against a conviction for selling milk defici--it in milk fat. It was alleged that he had not used proper care in feeding his cows, and had tried to get quan- tity without regard to quality. Mr. Ju<-tice Darling: There is nothing in the statute to say how cows are to be fed. j (Laughter.) I have heard it eaid of legisla- tion that the large quantity passed accounts for its poor quality. (Laughter.) It will come to this presently, that a farmer will have to keep a chemist. He will say, "The grass is very wet this morning; we must I give the cows a dose of something dry- t j (laughter) —say, seccotine." (Renewed laughter.) ——— I SHAVING FORBIDDEN. Claiming exemption at Stepney Military Tribunal, on the ground of conscience, a young man stated that he belonged to the tribe of Cohen, the laws of which forbade him to be in the presence of dead bodies, or in ajiv wav to MBist in the taking of human life. A Jewish member of the tribunal elicited from the applicant the declaration that he observed nil the laws of the Cohanim, and thereupon it was pointed out to him that among the nrst laws of the code waa one which forbade shaving. The member added that apparently the applicant had shaved that morning. (Laughter.) I THE DIFFERENCE. Talking' on the subject of indigestion, Mr. Rockefeller tells us that he "always stops eaUng- while he is still hungry." Dota of ppople. Mr. Rockefeller, do that—but not from choice (eays the "New York Puck"). ) A NEAR THING. An amusing story direct from the trenches was told by Major A. E. Winnmgton- Ban]Œ, at the annual meeting of the Actors' AoGciatían, The most cheery people, he :1 il. were the actors, of whom lie had nine- I kn in his battalion. His own servant was a c!og da-ncer, and one dav a shell hit the dng-otlt, or rather went on .one side of it. Wh.eil they had extricated themselves from tiip rr":d and slush the clog dancer came up with a smiling face and said, "A little bit ii the right, sir, and you would have p'yed Romeo on one leg." (Laughter.) I A VERBATIM REPORT. The reporters of a certain provincial town, having been criticised for their method of reportmg the speeches at the council's meet- ings, retaliated by giving the speech of one of the members exactly as it was spoken. When the councillor looked for hi& speech next morning it reaMi as follows:— "The reporters—ought not to—the re- porters ought not to be the ones to judge of what is important—not to say what should be left out—but—the members can only judge of what is important. As I—as my speeches—as the reports—as what I say is reported sometimes, no one—nobody can understand from the reports—what it is— what I mean. So—it strikes me—it has <:truck me certain matters—things that appear of no importance—are sometimes left out—omitted. The reporters—the papers- points are reported I mean-to make a brief statement what the paper thinks of interest is reported." A STORTING OFFER. Th<; chaplain of a fashionable church undertook the duty of collecting for S wounded soldiers' fund. Among the people he approached was a wealthy and jovial sportsman. "And what are you giving yourself, par- son?" asked the sportsman. "Ail I can anbrd," was the reply; "can I put yrm down for the same?" "Hardly," laughed the other; "but I'll make you a sporting oner. I'll give you fifty pounds if you agree to hand over the ('¡1tir collection at your service next Sun- da v morning." "Agreed," eaid the chaplain, and the sportsman's money was duly handed over. "Perhaps I mav aa well tell you," con- tinued the chaplam, as he pocketed the ten and handed the donor a receipt, "that next Sunday morning I'm preaching at t!w prison. I PICKINGS FROM "PUNCH." The recent Zeppelin raids have not been without their advantages. In a spirit of emulation an ambitious hen at Aeton has taid an egg we, hin- 51,oz. "BUR.Y MARRIED MjEN AND LORD DEBUT." Provincial Paper. A tempting solution of the Government's but perhaps a little too medieval fur the&c times. No, while it is a crime to spend money extravagantly en dress, it is just as em- phatically one to abstain from It alto- gather."—"Daily Chronicle." If the "Daily Chronicle" eays eo, we accept it There is no paper for whose judgment we have a more profound regard. I "OUR YOUNGEST GENERAL. He was educated at Glasgow University and Gottingen University, and entered the army in 1716."—"Baugalore Daily Post." Our Indian contemporary is misinformed. Several of our Generals arc younger th:m that. Eighteen tailors from Leeds have been arrested at Dublin as deserters from the Army. As nine tailors make a man this ia a net gain of two Tecruits. I -0 QUIPS FROM "L'ONDON OPINION." The match strike did not worry us so much as the matches which refuse to strike. Curat-es are said to be getting scarcer. The Army, no doubt, is diminishing the BTirplice supply. Naval schoolmasters are to wear a narrow strip of blue on their cuff. To show that they belong to the blue-water school? The Liquor Control Board has discovered a seerat imitation of bottled beer. It re- mains to be seen whether the public will want it to be an open-secret. There is a plan for keeping hens in Hyde Park. Thia will ensure Park lain eggs for Park Lane people. The pallid eligibles who are hiding in re- served occupations might be put down as our White Starred Line. Hun journalists are right in sneering at Marconi'a wonderful new wireless inven- tions. Herr Wolff remains unrivalled in thia rœpeet..
HIS LAST DHEAM OF HOME I HIS LAST DHEAM OF HOME
HIS LAST DHEAM OF HOME. I HIS LAST DHEAM OF' HOME. PATHETIC INCIDENT OF FLANDERS. Night in the trenches. Everything was dark, gloomy, and sombre, and though the British soldier was strain- ing his eyes to locate the enemy's posi- tion, ho failed, for it wa.s only whenoa,4 occasional shell burst that tlie melan- choly gloom was broken. To-night there was a lull in the battle, but the Tommies were expecting the Germans to tad,-e advantage of tha darkness, and make an attack; thus they were all astir, some leaning against the parapet, others reading 13t ters from home. Had it been light one of the forms by the parapet would have arrested attention. The omcers ad- nutted that Jack Cambridge was the smartest man in the battalion, and the j men said ho was one of the best." j Now lie was looking out on no ma-n land." as if trying to discern some in* j I x-isit)le object, but his thoughts were of ? another country, across the English j Channel, with win ding lares and grassy meadows. He pictured an old fashioned English country cottage, with a small low-ceiling kitchen. Then he imagined his wife nursing a baby girl whom hs had never seen. but to-morrow he was lea.ving France on a week's furlough. :Me.anwhile. over in the ￼ Meanwhile, over in the enemy ? trendies the word was being given fo<* a charge on the British lines, and silently the Huns crawled over the par-t- pets and directed their course towards ? the unsuspecting Tommies. a, rine shot rang through the still air< and the alarm given, the British stood with their rifles to their shoulders, awaiting the on-comdng foe. Then the order to fire was given-, and the crie? a'nd screams of wounded and dying mett showed only too denary that the sIlIn little messengers of death had found their billet. For fully ten minutes the fight ra-ged. land then it fell aq, silently as it began. The Germans had "turned tail." and fled back to their own lines, leaving a large number oi thmr dead behind them. The British then made u counter attack, and 'inspired with thoughts of victory, they made a grand charge, ano captured two lines of the enemy s trenches. A scene in a base hospital. The wards were full of wounded, and everV cot was occupied. This was the costot the great victory which the British papers had published. Certainly it was a victory, but victory is not always without its lo&ses. The crowded wards was the seq ue l. His head swathed with bandages. y ,jJJf¡Jjr è Jack Cambridge, who, but for the l!l' of ftQ, \vQn 1d have been ]Il\ England now, with his wife and child- Beside hnn stood a doctor and nurse His case was liopeless. the doctor had said. and the eyes of the .nurse were nlled with tears of pity a-s slie gazed into the calm face smiHng unconsci' ously at her. He was dreaming of Eng- land. He had letft France to go home on leave. Now he was rushing through the country at high speed in an express train, imagining the welcome he would receive w.hen he arrived at his cottage home. Presently the tmin reached tb-a ? station, and lie V alighted. He reTnem- ? bered every tree 'and stile he saw as he ? walked home. Then suddenly as ho ? rounded a bend in the road a delightful little thatched cottage came into view. and his heart beat fast with the jo" of expectation. The wtalls of the were embedded in roses and creepers, and on the steps stood tlie woman he loved with all his heart.. with a litJt.1e- ba.by girl in tier arms. He ran towards them. and embraced thorn in his arms. The doctor and the nurse stood watch* ing their sleeping patient. Suddenly he raised himself in bed, and spread out his 'arms. "Mv loved ones!" lie gasped, and then fell back—his face s.till smilmg. but his spirit had passed away! Another heroic man had 'added his name to the roll of honour.—E.T.S.
I REVIEW OF PUBLICATIONS
I REVIEW OF PUBLICATIONS. I "THE REVIEW OE REVIEWS." I c I The trcnttspiece to the July issue ° 1. "The Review of Reviews" is a fine ma-p of t.he main lines of railway o
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